How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
