They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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