Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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