And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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