But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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