And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
