i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Randomize
