Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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