Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
