Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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