I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
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