you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Randomize
