Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
