Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
