There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
