What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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