unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
