I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize