whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
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