They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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