Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
