just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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