who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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