i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
