That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
