its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize