Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
He passed out mid-signature
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
