dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
