belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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