My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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