One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize