I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Randomize
