I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
