oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Someone came in the potted fern
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
