my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize