I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
