Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
