I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
So squirting runs in the family.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
