FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
They have beer where we have blood.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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