I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
