Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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