My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize