Can Purell be used as lube?
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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