i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Randomize
