Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
When are your genitals available?
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
