the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
