god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
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