She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
