please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I need to sanitize my soul.
Randomize
