I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Randomize
