we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
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